The other morning, I was watching some youtube stuff on some coffee, and suddenly felt that I was taking it too easy and felt
guilty about it. I’ ve always been like that. I don’ t remember since when, but I’ ve always not been good at spending my holiday without thinking about my work, and I tend to think that I should always be doing some work. I always mention my delusions, but I always have a delusion of having a family sometime in the future, and I unnecessarily wonder if
I’ ll be able to spend time with them. It might have started when I got the first steady job. I was told by my senior that I’ d not be able to be present at my parents’ deaths if I engaged in the job and I had to be aware of it. Now I’ d say that it was a company with terrible working conditions (in Japan, we call such companies “Black companies” ) and it’ d be crazy if I actually could not be able to be absent from work even when my parents were about to die, but at the time back in the day, I accepted it without a question. Around that time, the head coach of Japan’ s national soccer team of the day, Arthur Antunes Coimbra, better known as Zico, went back to Brazil because of his mother’ s death just a few days before a match against Argentina, even though that was a friendly match. I saw the news and actually thought he was being so naïve as a head coach of the team that he went back home “just” because his mother’ s death right before an important match. I even have an experience of working for 2 years without a day off. I didn’ t even think that I wanted a day off. I spent all the time in the office except time for cleaning my house and doing laundry. It doesn’t mean that I couldn’t take a day off because I was too busy, but after working for the first half year without a day off, I thought I might have been able to continue working for another half without a year, and when I made it for a year, I started thinking that taking a day off without any very special reason is wasteful, and I ended up working for another year without a day off till I finally took a day off to attend my sister’ s wedding. I don’t do such over work anymore, but I still feel the resistance of taking a holiday as mentioned above. I like working, and there’ s not s day in which I don’ t do any work as If I take a whole day off without any work, the swing of my life gets out of shape. In fact, I’ m writing this right now on Sunday morning. The deadline is not coming up anytime soon, so I could do it tomorrow as well, but I have a piece of mind spending time working like this as the same as weekdays. In the first place, I feel responsible for work, but I’ ve never had a sense of duty on it. Working would rather be an extension of hobbies for me. Therefore, I’ ve never suffered from the “Sazae-San syndrome” . ” Sazae-San” is a Japanese popular animated TV program being broadcast on Sunday evening. Therefore, when people see this program, they feel that it’ s the end of the weekend and get depressed thinking about going back to work or study the next day.
That’ s called “Sazae-San syndrome” . Everybody has different points of view, so I don’t think that only my thoughts would be right, but if our very limited time of life is spent for work which we are not willing to do, that’ s a little wretched, I suppose. Therefore, when I first interviewed a Cambodian candidate for a job here in Cambodia, I thought that he was not motivated to work because he insisted on his holidays first of all. However, nowadays, when I see people spending good time with their families on Facebook and SNS, I envy them. My object for now will be to enhance both working and my private life.